What is the question?

The question is….

IS THIS IT?

I am so excited about it. Like SO excited! It makes me want to jump around.Makes me feel FREE!

– it gives me hope. and i could use some hope right now.

It will not always be like it is today. THANK GOD! (No really.. Thank You God)

This whole thing has become ridiculous. Laughingly Ridiculous. Like Are you F$^King kidding me?
Is this a practical joke?
Am I in the middle of a really cruel dream?

So Ridiculous in fact that I just can’t talk about the specifics anymore.
Just Plain ridiculous.

But just like the Freezing Cold that penetrates our skin into our bones this winter… inevitably the spring will come and the flowers and the leaves on the trees… It will NOT always be this cold.  While SIX months is absolutely positively ridiculous… it will NOT always look like this. And recently, that  is the ONLY thing I am clinging to.

So I reached out to a Life Coach who spoke to my condition (Thank You K) and she sent me this awesome Questionnaire to fill out. I really let go of my fears when I wrote this  and I want to share with you all..  Ask yourself these questions. I think they are good ones because our instinctive selves, I think want to give the answers that we feel everyone wants to hear… but leaves our souls yelling out to the contrary. Yes, It’s mostly about money. (AIN’T THAT THE KICKER!!!) If Money were no object.. I would be already in Charleston – on my way to… EVERYTHING!!!  One of those dreams is opening up my own Shop.

I found it interesting that What my secret passion is to open up a shop. My desire to do this has always been there… like I wrote it isn’t a secret. I just have NO idea HOW to do it and with what resources so I sorta bagged it years ago but recently… my thoughts have recently revived themselves to my shop.

Friday, I found this awesome ad on Craigslist for a Flower Shop/Gift Shop.  I left a message Friday nite and felt SO strongly about going there… so I did yesterday. I strangely felt connected SO strongly to that little shop. I didn’t have an appointment and didn’t get a call back.. I just KNEW I had to go there.  I talked to the owner about me,etc.. and mentioned my husband was a Chef (with regard to working Saturdays being okay) she asked where.. and I told her LIAS and she said she goes there most Wednesdays with her daughter and family. Weird? It is a cute shop.. not 100% what I envision for my Own shop… but it felt really good to be there. I left and she called me back while I was 5 minutes down the road.. to meet her husband. So I did. (Isn’t this weird?) Then she called me back a few hours later and asked if I’d come in a few hours this upcoming week to see if I’d be a good fit. WOW!!!!

(okay back to the kicker above.)

It doesn’t pay enough to survive. UGH!!!

So we’ll see… I feel like I’m being drawn to do this.

WHO KNOWS???

Dang…it’s like I have this bouquet of BURSTING IDEAS in my hands… Life Coach, Married to a Chef Website, Opening up Shop, Being a Mom, Moving down South… and all of them.. that damn kicker!!!! And I can’t do one without having money. It’s so…. I don’t know!

So that’s where I am… anxious… excited… giddy almost. Kinda like I get when I answer NO to

IS THIS IT?

So we’ll see…. I still have NO idea how to do it… but I cannot ignore the bouquet in my hands… I just need help to make them grow!!!

Let’s see what tomorrow and the next day brings…
Much Love,
Kerilyn

PS: Three RANDOM things:

1. You didn’t think I’d forget? Did you? Todays thing:

#615 When your friend makes sure you got into the house safe after dropping you off at the end of the night

I do this when I drop off my girl Kristy.. Make sure she gets in alright. I like when others do this for me..Especially when I open the door.. turn around and wave.. and they wave back.. Like a Silent Wave of Gratitude aimed at them as I wave…

2. I am going to mail Letter Numero Dos via my 4 goals for 2010 tomorrow!

3. I am starting with Season 1 of the Ghost Whisperer. (I heart Jennifer Love Hewitt) Secretly I love her clothes and her hair. (Going to get my hair cut soon… maybe not short but something different)